Chipper - An American Cocker Spaniel In Texas
Woo woo to Chipper! Happy New Year!
Notary Security Dog Alerts
by Ally - Texas, NSD CIP
(See Notary Security Dog Alerts
here)
This Notary Security Dog Alert is dedicated to my cousin,
Chipper Page. Chipper is a dog who has taught the rest of us
that if you learn to say "Woo woo!" much rejoicing comes
from the humans and they give you snacks and foody treats.
Chipper is an American Cocker Spaniel. And, from this Notary
Security Dog's pawspective, I don't know how Chipper manages
to patrol her inner territory without suffering from over-floppitism
and drama-droption. (Drama-droption and over-floppitism are
both ill health syndromes that Notary Security Dogs AND
their families can suffer from.)
I suppose the reason she manages is that she is not as
burdened with responsibility as I am since I am not only a
security bearing animal, but also one of elevated status in
that I am a Notary Security Dog.
Though I am a very powerful and savvy dog, not to mention,
one of the top Notary Dogs in America, I was frightened so
badly by the size of Chipper's territorial boundaries that I
literally got sick when I visited her at the human holiday
commonly known as Thanksgifting and the Feasting by Humans.
(By the way, Thanksgifting is a holiday humans celebrate
because they are so very thankful for their dogs. Dogs get a
lot of foody gifts on Thanksgifting following the
feasting.)
Chipper's territory is not only long and wide, it also goes
from the ground almost to the sky where rain comes from. The
highest point in my home is hardly much larger than
regulated territory dogglesize. Chipper's inner territory
is large and fully dogdom-manimous with so many large caves
I cannot keep count.
And, there are lots of starcases.
A starcase is a running and climbing area for star
dogs like me and Chipper. We show
off on them, and we also let the humans use them to get to
their sleeping caves. Be careful, though, because all human
sleeping caves in Chipper's territorial home also have a
badroom attached. The badroom is a place dogs where humans
usually show how insane or plain stupid they are by what
they do in those badrooms. (Stupid or insane humans are what
we live for though! They need us.)
Anyhow, the insane or stupid human puts a dog into nasty
smelling perfumed water for a "Bad." Then afterwards, the
insanity of the female human shows when she shreiks as a dog
shakes off all the perfumed water, and runs past them and
out the door and down the starcase.
But, I digress...back to Chipper's territory...Usually, one
of the humans tell the dogs when it is time to show off
their star-dogdom stuff. Other times, the stupid humans
forget about the stardom of dog stars use the starcases to
mount them without the dogs in order to take into, or
retrieve something from their sleeping caves.
One way the starcase is used for the good of dogs is like on
Thanksgifting, after the Feast of Humans. Aunt Debbie will
stand at the bottom of the starcase and start clapping and
telling me and Chipper to "Run, run, run...hurry,
hurry...faster!!!" It's fun for a little while, but Chip,
nor I, can ever get Aunt Debbie to do her part on the
starcases.
The starcases in Chipper's territory are massive and
dogdoubled and a dog can get nearly all the way to the
clouds by using them. They fork at one point and a dog has
to make a quick choice.
I got dizzy from all the climbing. The problem for me when I
am visiting Chipper, is that you can see the floor from both
sides of the starcases in Chipper's inner territory. (See,
the starcases are built especially so the star dogs can be
seen from all angles by humans while they perform.)
As a result of the open visual aspects, while on the top
part of the pawtrecherous starcases I realized I might fall
out of the side of the them and it scared me so bad that my
mom had to carry me up highest starcase when it was time for
us to go into our cave at night.
But moreso, my head spun from making decisions at the top of
the first starcase. If it were time for humans to go into
their caves to sleep, you see, a dog like me prances up a
starcase ahead of it's master to see if it's safe to let the
human go into the sleeping caves.
However, brave Chipper's territory requires that you make a
decision on which starcase you take first and you don't know
if you need to double back or just what is expected of you.
Where the starcase forks, a good Notary Security Dog knows
that have to stop and make a decision. I never know if I
should just go back down to the ground territory, or take
the rightpaw starcase or the leftpaw starcase.
If you go leftpaw there is a part of Chipper's territory
with a sleeping cave, a badroom, and a large cave with
something in it the humans call a pool table. (Now, about
that pool table cave, I have yet to see any water in that
room so I am not sure that the humans know what they are
yelping about on that one.)
Anyhow, the night after Thanksgifting I was so full of
drama-droption I lost my foody gifts all over my human while
she was sleeping. But, the next morning, Chipper was ready
to do a full "WOO WOOOOOO! upon request, and thus more
snacks were showered on both of us as a result. THANK YOU
CHIPPER! I hope you have a doggle-dandy new year. See you as
soon as your humans fix those skyscratching starcases.
Best wishes for a pawperous New Year to you All...
Your Canine Reporter from Texas:
Ally Stone
NSD CIP
(Notary Security Dog, Certification is Pending)